In movies and traditional male culture, the sexual charge comes from a premarital relationship or an extramarital affair. You almost never see marital sex in a movie. Newness, illicitness, and adventure are highly valued sexually. A marital or serious relationship is often taken for granted, and the sex settles into a functional routine rather than an involving, erotic experience. Men cheat themselves by settling for a marginal relationship and a mediocre sex life with canadian pharmacy viagra. Typically, it is the woman who complains about a stable but unsatisfying relationship. When she threatens to leave or actually leaves, it is a wake-up call for the man, but often too late. Sex is not the only ingredient in a healthy relationship, but sexual avoidance is a major relationship drain.
Future Relationship Vitality
If men approached their careers like they approach their intimate relationships, there would be a dramatic rise in bankruptcies in our culture. You can learn to value your intimate, erotic relationship rather than treat it with benign neglect. Like every other component in life, you have to put time and energy into your relationship to Exercise: Identifying Sexual Problems and Creating a Change Plan
To make these concepts personal and concrete, identify sexual problems in your life. We encourage you to use the biopsychosocial approach to assessment. Are there psychological concerns/ problems — attitudes, behaviors, or emotions — that interfere with relationship and sexual satisfaction? What about illness, side effects of medication, or health habits that subvert sexual function? Are there relationship factors that subvert sexual function and satisfaction? Don’t deny; be honest with yourself and ask for feedback from your partner. Write out in a clear, specific manner what factors — psychological, physiological, and relational — interfere with sexual function and satisfaction.
The second phase of this exercise is even more important. What do you need to do individually and as a couple to address these problems? Can you do it on your own, or would a wiser course be to consult a therapist or physician? Most men prefer to solve problems on their own, but often the wisest choice is to use all your resources — your partner, physician, information from books or trusted Web sites, and/or an individual, couple, or sex therapist. You deserve to have a healthy, satisfying life and sexuality. You can confront problems and make positive changes.